When a loved one with dementia starts losing weight, our first thought is usually, “they aren’t eating enough.”
Yet, the problem is often not as simple as having no food in front of them—rather, small, everyday things make eating difficult. Let’s look at the most common ones.
1. Putting too large a portion on the plate
Many people think that if someone with dementia is already eating less, there should at least be a large portion in front of them. However, a heaped plate of food can be frightening for many people living with dementia. They look at it, and their appetite is gone right away. A much better solution is to offer smaller portions. If it’s gone, they can always have a little more. This way, they often eat more than when they see too much food at once in front of them.
2. Relying only on the three main meals
Many people stick strictly to the breakfast–lunch–dinner routine. Yet, in dementia, it often works better if several smaller meals follow each other throughout the day. A banana, a yogurt, a few cubes of cheese, or a slice of sweet bread can mean a lot between two meals as well. It doesn’t matter if they don’t eat the daily amount all at once.
3. Too much bustle during mealtime
A TV turned on. Several people talking at once. A ringing phone. These can easily distract someone with dementia. Let’s try to create a calm environment. Often, just this much helps ensure that more bites are eaten.
4. Not noticing that their mouth hurts
If someone has a toothache or their dentures are pinching, it’s natural that they don’t like to eat. However, a loved one with dementia cannot always tell you this. It is worth paying attention to the small signs. For example, if they only chew on one side, spit out the food, or grimace while eating.
5. Drinking too little fluid
Dehydration not only worsens well-being, but it can also reduce appetite. On top of that, constipation becomes more common, which also takes away the desire to eat. Let’s not wait until they ask for a drink. Offer it to them often in smaller amounts. Many people accept tea, soup, fruit, or even a smoothie much more easily than a glass of water.
6. Always cooking the same thing
They may have loved stuffed cabbage in the past. Today, however, they might not be interested in it at all. In dementia, tastes can change as well. Many people prefer sweet flavors, while others crave softer foods. It’s worth experimenting sometimes. A simple pancake, semolina porridge, or fruit yogurt might be a bigger success than a former favorite meal.
7. Giving up after the first “no”
– Would you like some lunch?
– No.
And with that, the meal is already over. Yet, it’s possible that ten minutes later, they would happily eat. The mood and attention of someone with dementia can change quickly. It is worth trying again later. Not forcing, not arguing, just kindly offering the opportunity to eat again. Very often, they accept it on the second or third try.
A small trick that often works
If your loved one finds it hard to sit down to eat, don’t ask:
– Are you hungry?
Often, they automatically answer no to this. Try it like this instead:
- Taste this, it turned out really delicious!
- Taste this to see if it’s salty enough!
- I’m going to eat a little now, come sit next to me!
Eating then won’t be a task, but a shared activity.
Important Disclaimer
The information and advice presented on this website and in this article are for informational purposes only. They do not constitute a medical diagnosis or individual therapeutic recommendations. The operator/author of the website assumes no liability for any direct or indirect damages, health issues, or misunderstandings resulting from the use of this information. Everyone applies the described methods at their own risk. Please consult your physician before making any lifestyle changes or applying any complementary therapies.
About the Author
Suzanne Sandwiese – Dementia Caregiver, Mental Health Assistant
I have more than 12 years of practical experience in caring for elderly people and patients living with dementia. My goal is to translate knowledge about dementia into understandable, practical advice that can be applied in daily life, thereby helping families live together with the disease. As the author of several professional books and the founder of a popular Facebook page, my mission is to provide clear and, above all, usable guidance to all those who care for loved ones living with dementia.
Looking for practical, hands-on guidance for caring for a loved one with dementia at home? This comprehensive guide offers real-world advice and strategies to help you navigate everyday caregiving with confidence.
Struggling with stress-free bathing, hair washing, or nail care for a person with dementia? Discover practical, empathetic techniques to turn daily hygiene routines into calm and dignified experiences.
Managing incontinence in dementia care can feel overwhelming, but the right approach makes all the difference. Learn practical, experience-based steps to maintain dignity, comfort, and routine at home.
Agitation and aggressive behaviors in dementia are often cries for help rather than intentional actions. Discover practical, practical-proven techniques to de-escalate difficult situations and create a peaceful environment.
Apathy, anxiety, and mood changes are among the hardest non-verbal symptoms of dementia to navigate. This practical guide helps you understand these emotional challenges and offers actionable steps to support your loved one.
